


Dawn

by Bridghid



Category: The Hobbit (2012)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-13
Updated: 2013-06-05
Packaged: 2017-12-08 09:15:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/759680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bridghid/pseuds/Bridghid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fili and Kili finally realize that their feeling are mutual. With a little nudge of course.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fili

**Author's Note:**

> Standard disclaimer: I own nothing. Wish I did. But I don't.

Fili stretched out his legs in front of him, glad to rest his back against a tree after a long hard day of riding. It seemed ever since this journey started, there had been less and less time to relax at night. As soon as Thorin chose a place to rack for the night, Bombur made supper, everyone slept (except those on watch), and then the dawn would come too soon.

Fili drew out his blades and tested their readiness. He had sharpened them the night previous, but better to be an overly cautious dwarf than a dead dwarf. This task was also simple and soothing. It was just him, a whetstone and his blades. Nothing more, nothing less.

While inspecting each blade, Fili couldn’t help but search out his brother’s frame in the mass of bodies that hovered around the fire waiting for Bombur to finish supper. Kili looked to be in the middle of causing mischief. Not that this was surprising. Or news. In fact, Fili could count the number of times Kili had not been causing mischief on one hand ever since his birth

Fili smiled to himself remembering that day.

_He had been waiting for his mother to find him hidden in the garden, for what – to his mind at least – was FOREVER. Fili kept giggling to himself that he had outsmarted his mother once again. A crash from the kitchen distracted him._

_Fili crept out from under the headge and around to peer through the open kitchen door. His mother was braced over the kitchen table, a pile of broken earthenware at her feet. Through her pursed lips, she told Fili to go find Uncle Thorin, and to be quick about it._

_Fili could remember the shock on his uncle’s face when his young nephew came running full tilt into the forge, covered in dirt, scrapes and tear tracks running down his face. Thorin picked him up and settled him on his hip, and ran a soothing hand over his back. When Fili finally got it out through hiccups and tears that his mother was asking for him, Thorin made quick work of sending for a healer and headed over to his sister’s house._

_It was hours later, and the tears still tracked down Fili’s face at random. His uncle sat with him in the kitchen and tried to distract him through various games and stories. Not that that worked very well. Fili could still hear his mother’s whimpers and the murmers of the healer._

_The tortured wait however, was well worth it. The whimpers ceased, and the silence was deafening. Only to be broken by a loud wail. Fili was shocked to see how broadly his uncle smiled at the sound. When he was finally allowed in the room, Thorin helped him climb up onto the bed with this mother and see what all the fuss had been about._

_It wasn’t until the next day that his new brother Kili opened his eyes. The second their eyes connected, Fili couldn’t contain his excitement. He knew he would do anything for his brother. Be anything he was needed to be. Show the younger all that he had learned so far, teach him about everything._

_The first time Kili smiled was when he was in Fili’s arms. Their mother just smiled from afar and let Fili care for his younger brother. Many other dwarves had commented that it was too much to expect from a youngling, but Dis knew that no harm would come to Kili with his older brother standing protectively by. The brothers’ bond was unbreakable._

Fili watched as the hobbit mumbled a response to whatever it was his bothersome brother asked, and was captivated by Kili’s smile and boisterous laugh. No matter what was going on, his brother was always quick to smile. It was one of his most endearing qualities.

Fili loved to watch his brother. He couldn’t believe how much grace his brother had. Kili’s movement had been graceful ever since he was born. While Kili was teased about his looks, Fili couldn’t help but be awed by them. Envious as well. From Kili’s wind swept dark hair, mirth-filled eyes, to his lithe, compact body, he was perfect. Not necessarily your typical dwarf, but stunning to look at.

Fili returned his focus to his blades. Kili was safe causing the mischief he reveled in, leaving Fili time to work. As such, the steaming bowl of stew suddenly thrust under his nose took him a bit by surprise. Fili looked up at his brother and glared. Not that it did much to dampen the smirk plastered to his brother’s face. If anything, the look became more devilish.

“Brother, you seemed a bit distracted. I was concerned that you forgot about supper.”

Fili rolled his eyes, set aside his weapons and pulled the proffered bowl to his lap.

“Also, Bombur was eye balling your ration.”

Fili smiled. “Thank you brother. What would I do without you?”

Kili plopped down next to Fili. “I’m not sure actually. Eat less that’s for sure. Be bored out of your tree without my jokes. Have better luck with the ladies without my charm and good looks to compete with.” Kili turned to face his brother at this and waggled his eyebrows.

Fili forced a smile at this. His brother’s last comment struck the nerve he had been trying to bury ever since he was old enough to understand that his love for Kili went far beyond what an older brother should feel. Which was about sixty years ago. Fili looked down at his bowl and sighed.

While his brother did not look like the typical dwarf, many wanted him. Fili lost track of how many propositions his brother had received. In reality, he had stopped paying attention to them in an effort to curb his irrational jealousy. Every time a dwarf approached his brother, Fili had to walk away, always using a different excuse as to why. He needed some fresh air. This pub was boring. The music was horrible. Too many people were inside the building at the time. Forgot something at home. The list of excuses went on and on.

Each time he walked away, Fili always made sure to disappear from his brothers’ sight for a short while. He did not want to see the satisfaction of another on Kili’s face. Or smell another on his body. Thankfully, when Kili managed to find him again – working at the forge, in the library, at home, in the quarry, wherever – Kili always looked like Kili. Hair a mess, the same sparkle in his eyes, and smelling of the earth, wind, and something that was purely Kili.

A shoulder bumping into his brought Fili back to himself.

“You’re on watch first tonight.”

Fili looked over at his brother, his puzzlement showing on his face. “Are you not as well?”

Kili shook his head. “Thorin put me on watch just before dawn this night.”

“Why?”

Kili shrugged. “I’ll let you ask him that brother. Let me know when though. I want to get good seats, and have enough time to gather the other dwarves for a wager.”

Fili smiled and finished off the last of his meal. “Who replaces me?”

“Bofur.”

Fili pulled his cloak from his bedroll and stood. “Goodnight brother. See you in the morning.”

“Yes, you too.” With that, Kili disappeared into his bedroom adjacent to Fili’s.

Fili carried their bowls over to the fire after rinsing them quickly in the stream and headed over to a good vantage point to ensure the safety of the camp. Most of the company was already asleep, with the rest well on the way.

He couldn’t help but curse his uncle under his breath. Kili and he were always assigned watch together. On every hunting trip, excursion, and the entire journey to date they had never been separated. What had gone through their uncle’s mind to suddenly change this? What had he done to suddenly be denied his brothers company?

His watch was the longest in his memory without Kili at his side. His brother’s absence went far beyond the jokes, stories, and mischief. Fili felt so alone without his brother’s presence by his side. Even when silent, Kili always had an aura of youth and joy around him that offset Fili’s natural seriousness. The night was too still without the constant hum that lay under his brother’s skin. Even the light breeze did nothing to lift his spirits.

Fili’s eyes were starting to droop by the time Bofur came to relive him. Fili made it back to his bedroll and knelt down. Kili had placed his bedroll beside his, and lay curled on his side with his back just resting on Fili's bedroll. Fili smiled at how Kili clutched his cloak under his chin just as he had every night since he was born. It reminded Fili how very young Kili could be sometimes.

With that thought Fili’s heart dropped into his boots. His brother was truly too young to be on this quest. Five years wasn't much, but it may as well have been a lifetime. His thoughts were constantly plagued by how he could keep Kili safe. And yet, Fili knew he would be even more worried if Kili had been forced by their uncle to remain home for this quest. Not having Kili in his sight for that long – who knew what kind of trouble Kili would find. Fili's heart skipped beats when his brother was not within sight or touch.

Fili stretched out facing his brother. Kili’s features were relaxed in sleep, with the curl of a smile to the right side of his lips as always. Fili gave into temptation and traced his brother’s lips lightly with his finger before closing his eyes and relaxing into his dreams.


	2. Kili

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kili's point of view.

It took Kili what seemed an extra long time to fall asleep. Without his brother’s calming presence by his side, he couldn’t seem to calm his thoughts enough to drift to sleep right away. Kili laughed at himself, and turned onto his back to stare at the stars and moon through the break in the forest canopy.

His brother reminded him of the stars and moon. Always present, always watching even when hidden by clouds. Fili was steady, and calm. He never felt balanced without his brother by his side.

Ever since he could remember, Fili was always watching his back. From playground to battle field, he was never alone. Even though years separated them, they did everything together.

_Kili remembered overhearing uncle Thorin speaking to Fili about the journey to reclaim Erebor, and the flash of jealousy and anxiety that accompanied the news. Hiding beneath the window sill quietly was the hardest task Kili had ever set for himself as he listened to his kin plan for their departure the next day._

_Kili could barely contain himself to not whimper at the thought of Fili traveling by himself. Utter panic and the shame at the paralyzing fear of being separated from his brother kept Kili hidden as he heard his brother agree to the terms of the journey and move upstairs to pack._

_Seeing his uncle’s back as he exited the house finally pushed Kili into action. Kili smiled as he remembered his uncles face as he all but tackled him to get him to listen to why he should be allowed to join the quest. Thorin let him rant and plead until he had to stop to catch his breath._

_Thorin had gently placed his hand over his youngest nephews mouth to stop to endless stream of words from beginning again. Kili swore he saw his uncles eyes smile. When he was sure that Kili wouldn’t begin his rant again, he removed his hand._

_“Hush now. Did no one tell you eavesdropping would get you into trouble?”_

_Kili’s eyes had widened at this. “But Uncle, how else am I to know what is going on?” Kili swallowed quickly. “Please don’t make me stay here away from my brother. Please Uncle.”_

_Kili remembered how Thorin’s eyes had seemed to search through him to his very core. “Very well. Listen to my orders. Listen to your brother. Do not be foolish. I trust you understand the seriousness of this journey?”_

_“I may be young, but I’m not that young.”_

_“You will always be young nephew. Go pack. Your brother leaves at first light.”_

_Kili had bounded into the room he shared with Fili and threw his pack onto his bed and began to toss items into it. Needless to say, Fili wasn’t surprised that Kili was coming along._

_“Kili, calm down. I won’t leave without you.” Fili had walked over and pulled apart Kili’s haphazard packing. Fili began to calmly fold and organize his brother’s things and repack them into the ruck. “You’ll thank me later when your pack is balanced.”_

_Their eyes had met, and Kili felt the tension he had been carrying melt from his shoulders. Whatever would he do without his brother’s watchful eye?_

Kili thought back to supper and the look on his brothers face as he cleaned his blades. Fili had looked so distant and so sad in that moment, and Kili couldn’t figure out why. What he did know, what that he hated seeing that look on his face. It made him want to do anything in his power to make him smile again.

Since his brother looked so distracted, he filled both of their bowls, and began to thread his way through the melee of dwarves waiting for their rations. Thorin stopped him on the way over.

“Kili, you have the dawn watch. Tell Fili he has first watch. Bofur is second.”

“Why?”

“Why what Kili?”

Kili swallowed. “Why are we separated?”

When Thorin continued to just look at him, Kili cleared his throat, broke eye contact and carried on to his brother to deliver the news. Kili took devilish delight in surprising his brother with the bowl of food. And the sweet smile of thanks was the icing on the cake.

Kili was puzzled when Fili’s smile tightened and turned almost into a sneer. The narrowing of his brother’s eyes and tension in his shoulders radiated over Kili. Kili rewound the conversation in his mind to see where he went wrong. His brother always laughed at his jokes. Always lovingly answered back with a witty and sharp barb.

Comment on eating? Nope. Comment on boredom? Nope that was true. Comment on his looks and charm? Nope. Innocent banter. He had never touched anyone and his brother knew that.

Every time they went out together, other dwarves would always approach them and his brother would always make some excuse and disappear. Kili would look everywhere for his brother, eventually finding him hours later covered in sweat. Kili sighed. Fili’s life was his own, but sometimes Kili wished that his brother would be content with him and not need to seek out the company of others.

Kili’s heart sank to his boots, and he couldn’t bear his brother’s closed off posture. Remembering Thorin’s instructions, Kili gave a light nudge to his brothers’ shoulder, and told him of the watch schedule. Fili was as shocked as he was that Thorin had separated them. They had never been separated before.

Kili caught a glimpse of this brother on watch at the far end of the camp. By now the fire had reduced itself to glowing coals. The moonlight glinted in his brothers hair and caught the various beads at the end of his braids. His brother looked lost on watch by himself. And sad.

Kili curled onto his side and pulled his cloak over himself. The dawn watch would come soon enough, and Kili knew he needed sleep. At times, he regretted convincing his uncle to let him come along. His bed was a lot more comfortable than the rocks and various tree roots that were currently digging into his back.

Kili drifted to sleep and dreamt of his brother.

Hours later Kili woke in preparation for his turn at watch. The dawn watch really wasn’t too bad. At least his sleep had been uninterrupted. Kili smiled at his brother. When their mother had decreed they were too old to sleep together in one bed, it had been a battle of wills of epic proportions. It was Thorin’s edict that they separate that had settled that argument. His only concession being that they be allowed to share a room.

So Kili loved being out in the wild with Fili. It was the only time they were allowed to sleep beside one another. While hearing his brother’s breath across the room maintained his sanity, it was never enough. Having his brother close enough to feel his warmth and breath whispering across his cheek always lulled Kili into a deeper and more content sleep.

Kili took an extra minute and shuffled his body closer to his brother to touch their foreheads together. Kili gently cupped his brothers cheek, before pulling himself out of the comfort of the warmth they shared and over to relieve Nori.

A new day, which always meant new trouble to find. Fili always said he couldn’t live without mischief, which Kili resented. He could live without trouble. It just wasn’t as much fun.

Kili smirked. He knew just what he could do while he sat on watch. There was prank waiting to happen, and this would be the perfect opportunity to plan it.


	3. Thorin

His nephews were idiots sometimes. Well, scratch the sometimes. His nephews were just plain idiots. The entire company could see how the two brothers skirted around one another. By Aule, even the hobbit had noticed, and he just joined the company.

Thorin couldn’t figure out for the life of him how the two were still clueless about the fact that they were in love with each other. It wasn’t common for two siblings to fall in love with each other this was true. But it was not unheard of. Granted, his sister probably didn’t help their assumption all those years ago when she had forced the two boys to sleep in separate beds.

It took everything in him to keep Dis from forcing the boys to sleep in rooms on either side of hers. Thorin was glad the boys were out with Balin for lessons when he had that conversation. The yelling and crashing of the thrown earthenware probably carried farther than either knew at the time.

Thorin shifted his body against the stone outcropping he was using to lean on. He could understand his sisters argument. She wanted her sons to carry on the line. To fall in love with a dwarf lass, and give her grandchildren to dote over. But anyone who met the two princelings could sense their connection, and knew that the odds of them falling for anyone other than each other was somewhere between nil and none.

Honestly, did Dis really believe it would be any different? Since Kili’s birth the two were inseparable. Kili would always drag his brother into trouble, and Fili would help his meddlesome brother to find their way out of it again. Fili had a smile that he reserved only for his brother. The first time Thorin had seen it at Kili’s birth, he had passed it off as excitement about a new sibling. Definitely not the case. That smile followed Kili no matter what they were doing. From the mundane work of fishing to the excitement of travel.

Thorin grimaced as he remembered teaching the boys how to fish a very long time ago.

_Thorin was helping Fili to correct his stance at the shore line. The fishing line was hanging in the water, and the fish were clearly visible beneath the crystal clear lake. Fili’s concentration on the task at hand was belied by his constantly flickering eyes to the last place he had seen his brother._

_Kili had climbed the tree next to the water’s edge, saying the fish would have to wait a few minutes. There were much more important things to see from above the canopy apparently. Thorin could hear quiet giggles coming from high above, and knew that the little imp was having a grand time._

_Cracking branches alerted him of Kili’s rapid descent. “Uncle!” He heard. “There’s a bear staring at us!”_

_Thorin tried to keep his panic at bay. He followed Kili’s shaking finger to a break in the foliage to see the bear staring at them. Unfortunately, the bear now stood between the three dwarves and his sword. Foolish, Thorin had cursed himself. Sloppy. What did he teach his nephews just the other day? That ‘safety’ should never be trusted. Keep your weapons with you at all times._

_What does he do? Travel to the waters edge meters from their camp with only his bow and arrows, which he was admittedly not he best shot with, and a dagger._

_“We could climb the tree quick uncle. Hurry!” Kili was pulling on his hand._

_Thorin sighed, and slipped his dagger from his belt quietly. “Bears climb.” Thorin turned to Fili. “You and your brother cross the water, and keep moving until you make town. It’s not far. I will meet you there.”_

_Kili looked from his uncle to the bear and then to his brother. “But bears are fast.”_

_Thorin smiled. “Yes they are. I will be faster.”_

_Thorin remembered pushing his two young nephews towards the water, and turning to face down the bear. With luck, the bear would understand the threat, and leave them in peace._

_His eyes had narrowed when he saw blonde hair out of the corner of his eye. Splashes told him Kili was in the water, but his foolish older nephew chose to stand by him, clutching his small dagger in his fist. He dragged the child behind him when the bear charged towards them._

_Air whistled past him, and the bear dropped. An arrow shot clean through the eye. Thorin whipped around to see his youngest nephew holding his bow and nocking a new arrow to the string like it was meant to be in his hands._  

_Thorin remembered his youngest nephews toothy smile as he threw his arm around the boys’ shoulders. “The bow for you then I see.”_

Thorin couldn’t believe how good of a shot his nephew was. Especially then. The bow was a rare weapon for a dwarf to be drawn to. But his nephew used his bow and arrows like they were a part of his body. Admittedly, just as Fili used his swords like they were part of his arms.

Thorin almost laughed as he saw each brother watching the other from across the fire. Both thought they were being subtle, but neither succeeded. In fact, it was a running joke watching the two moon over each other. Mainly told when the two were so obviously distracted by each other.

Dwalin and Balin approached and stood on either side of their king. “You have to do something about those two laddie.”

“What would you have me do Balin? Tie them together until they figure it out?" 

Dwalin smirked. “How about separate them?”

Thorin turned to look at his two most trusted advisors. “That could work.” 

Dwalin turned to face Balin. “One purse says three days.”

“Two days.” Balin countered.

“Done.”

Thorin chuckled as the two dwarves shook on the bet, and moved towards the fire to claim their rations. Pulling Kili aside and telling him of the changed watch schedule was comical. The youngling was shocked that he was being separated from his brother.

The two brothers continued to dance around each other as they ate. Honestly. The open yearning on their faces when they thought the other wasn’t looking was beginning to be too much. Thorin could understand why Dwalin and Balin had approached him this night. An entire journey full of angst and unrequited love would be too much to handle for much longer.

Thorin watched more bets be placed by the fire as word spread of the plan to push the two brothers together. Sadly, it was uncouth for a king to place a bet. Especially on his young nephews hopefully soon to exist love life. However, he would have put money on six days. His nephews, after all, were his blood kin. He knew how stubborn the Durin line could be.


	4. Day One

When everyone began to move quietly around camp, Kili left his watch post and made his way over to his brother. Fili was still curled up and had progressed to lie cross-wise across both his and Kili’s abandoned bedroll, which made Kili smile. Fili always said he was a bed hog. Ha! He had news for him. Kili dropped down to land hard on top of his brother. A nice awakening was not in the cards for his brother this morning.

Fili shouted and bucked hard to push the invading body off of his. Kili managed to pin one of his brother’s hands before Fili got the upper hand temporarily. The two were rolling and tussling, until Fili managed to pin his brother beneath him. Kili squirmed below him for a few seconds to test the hold, before becoming still. Both brothers stared at each other completely motionless.

The rest of the company, on the other hand, continued to squirm. The brothers play fighting and wrestling each other was commonplace. But the obvious electricity that was passing through them made everyone uncomfortable. The position didn’t help either. Whether the two clueless wonders realized it or not, Fili’s hips lay cradled between his brothers thighs, and hands their hands were anchoring each other above their heads.

The brother’s had but inches before their lips would touch. Judging by the intense stare, something was churning in their thick skulls. No one in the company moved. Each dwarf held their breath to see what would happen next.

Sensing the stillness of the camp, Fili and Kili looked over to see everyone staring at them. The brother’s shifted, realized their position, and shot up and away from each other. A blush stained their cheeks as they made mumbled excuses and drifted to opposite ends of the camp.

Fili ended up by the water’s edge and let out the breath that he had been holding ever since leaving his brothers side. His heart still thumping in an off beat. He had almost given everything away. Fili clenched his hands into fists, and staved off the urge to throw something into the river.

What would his brother have done if he had given into his need to brush their lips together? Fili imagined the look of disgust he would have gotten and shuddered. He would have to be more careful.

Kili lay on the bedroll seconds after his brother had stormed off, then scrambled out into the surrounding forest. He swallowed hard a couple of times, trying to put his bounding heart back where it was meant to be. It was impossible to be sure, but he didn’t think his brother found out his secret.

He scrubbed his face hard with his hands for a moment. His brother had been way too close for comfort. Kili chuckled as he realized that he would no longer be able to wrestle with his brother. He reached down and adjusted himself in his breeches; thankful his brother did not notice the change when they had been pressed intimately together.

“Oi! Grub.” Kili heard called from the clearing. He moved cautiously towards his brother, whom already had his bowl of food waiting by their bedrolls. Kili could feel his cheeks stain red again, thinking of the position he had been in at just this spot mere moments earlier.

The company shifted and meaningful looks passed between the dwarves. The brothers almost figured it out. Not one word was spoken by anyone.

Thorin sat silent across from his nephews. His eyes coolly assessing the idiots he called kin. All he could hope for was to see a quick resolution, and to spend the rest of the journey free of the painfully obvious and unrequited love of the two brothers.

Fili and Kili were still dancing around each other by the day’s end. They had still ridden side by side, but had not spoken a work to one another save for comments on the weather. The awkward glances didn’t help either. Each brother peeking through the corner of his eye to check on the other.

By the time the next camp was reached, the entire company was feeling the tension emanating off the two brothers. It was so bad, Bombur almost burnt supper. Thankfully, the hobbit noticed and saved the day’s ration. Needless to say, he took an awful lot of ribbing for that one.

Thorin approached Fili and Kili while they ate. The brothers were sitting with almost a foot of space between them. Thorin wanted to roll his eyes. The two were normally glued side by side. In fact, sometimes it seemed as if they were actually Siamese twins instead of brothers with years separating them. Both looked up at Thorin’s approach. Fili looked resigned to what he assumed was coming. Kili looked relieved for the distraction.

“Kili, you take the first watch tonight. Fili, dawn.”

Kili sighed and brushed past his uncle to select a good location to spend his watch.

Fili looked down at his brothers’ half empty bowl left sitting on the ground. “I should, uh, take that to him.”

Thorin sat next to his oldest nephew. Fili looked completely lost and unsure of himself. Which, Thorin had to admit, was unlike him. Thorin steeled himself for the coming conversation, and reminded himself to tread gently. Matters of the heart rarely made as much sense to those in the thick of things than to those on the outside.

“What troubles you?”

Fili looked at him in surprise. “What do you mean uncle?” Fili shoveled another spoonful of stew into his mouth. “Nothing troubles me.” When Thorin just continued to stare at him, Fili swallowed thickly. “I should take that bowl to Kili. Otherwise he will be hungry and it will no longer be warm.”

“I will bring it to him later. Now enough excuses nephew.” Thorin turned to fix his eye on Fili. The better to get a straight answer out of the lad. “Do you think I have known you for so little time that I cannot tell when you are troubled by something? I have known you since your birth.”

Fili sighed and avoided eye contact. “I know. It’s just…private that’s all.”

“There is nothing private in my family. Now, you can either tell me what bothers you, or not. Let me assure you that I will find out eventually. Also, anything that affects you is of concern to me while on this journey. Everyone’s safety depends on this honesty.”

Chewing his lip thoughtfully for a minute, Fili turned his uncle’s words over in his mind. “Why did you separate us?”

Thorin struggled not to smile as his nephew’s obvious discomfort. “Is this really what is bothering you?”

“Yes. We have never been separated before. Did I do something wrong?”

“No nephew you did not. Before you ask, no, Kili did not cause mischief. I just felt that you two would appreciate a few hours apart.”

Fili shuffled in his seat, and would not look up from his meal. “I do not like being apart from him.” He whispered, as if it were some shameful secret.

Thorin purposefully looked over into the fire. “Nor does he.” Thorin picked up Kili’s abandoned bowl and stood. “Think on what I have said nephew.”

Fili watched his uncle walk towards where Kili had disappeared. He had no idea what his uncle was talking about. Kili was a free spirit, and lived just fine without Fili around to watch his back.

The company settled down to sleep rather quickly. There had been minimal conversation around the fire, in which Dori had admitted defeat that the brothers wouldn’t figure out their love day one. He lost one purse.


	5. Day Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry everyone. There was a death in my immediate family, so I haven't been up to writing lately. I had intended to write more for this chapter, but this will have to suffice for now. I will continue writing, but the updates may take a little bit.

Fili was tired. He fell asleep no problem. Staying asleep was another matter entirely. As soon as Kili had dropped down beside him, he felt his body return to full awareness. His body felt over sensitized, every nerve ending tuned to the suble movements of the body beside his. Every breath Kili took seemed to radiate through his body.

For the first time in years, Kili faced away from him while he slept. And Fili didn’t know how he felt about that. Even when they were separated into beds on opposite sides of a room, they always faced each other. Both brothers needed to be able to see one another if nothing else.

Not being able to feel Kili’s breath brushing past his cheek made Fili nervous. While he could see the minute movements of Kili’s chest rising and falling, he needed to see his brother’s face. Needed to see the stress of the day melt away from Kili’s body.

Fili turned onto his back. Thorin had picked an outcropping of a mountain for their rest tonight. As such there were very few trees to block the night sky. Fili loved watching the sky. It was so dark and mysterious. With mischief around every corner.

Reminds him of Kili. With that last thought, Fili fell asleep.

When Fili woke in the morning prior to his watch shift, he wanted to go right back to sleep. Sometime in the night, he and Kili had drifted towards each other. His brother’s back was pressed against his chest, and Fili took the opportunity to nuzzle his nose into his brother’s neck.

Aule, his brother smelled good. So fresh and clean. It took every ounce of will he had in his body to force himself to pull away from Kili and sit up. And even more when his little brother let out a sigh and tried to shift his body back into him.

Fili shifted to run his hands over his brother, pausing briefly over the hip. Fili bent and breathed in his brothers’ scent, then pushed himself away to head over to relieve Ori. A piece of parchment fluttering down to the ground drew his attention. He picked it up, stared curiously at the folded paper, and kept walking.

Fili unfolded the parchment carefully once he was alone and blushed. Someone had drawn a picture. Granted, the picture was innocent. But it showed him curled against his brother. From what he could see, both of their expressions were quite content.

He only wished it was mutual.

The day passed much like the day before. With one exception. All Fili could think about was the picture someone in the company had drawn. He was going to kill whoever drew this particular picture. What if Kili had found it? Oh Aule, what if everyone in the company knew and told Kili? He would die before losing his brother. He had to get control over this and now.

He would have to cut more time away from Kili. Starting today.

Riding apart from his brother was the hardest thing he had every done. He felt so alone without his brother. And honestly, all Dwalin talked about was food and the women he had. It was the longest day of his life.

Fili had to keep reminding himself how important this disassociation from his brother was. He couldn’t even look behind him to see where Kili was. He didn’t need to. Fili could feel his brothers’ dark eyes burning through his back.

By lunch, the entire company was silent. Which was eerie, truth be told. No songs, stories or laughter. Even the hobbit wasn’t up to his usual standard. By the time they made camp, everyone was relieved to rest, and to start a new day. Hopefully, the new day would be back to normal.

One member of the company rolled his eyes. What idiots those two brothers were. He had left that drawing for Fili to try and help the two brothers realize what everyone else knew.

But no. The brother’s didn’t speak at all that night. He would just have to step up the stakes tomorrow. After all, he had three purses’ bet on this.


	6. Day Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it took me so long to get back into this. Thank you everyone for your patience.

It took time for him to finish the second drawing. Everyone in the company was asleep, and the fire banked. There was still enough light for him to see where he was going. The two brothers were curled around one another, and it took some delicate finger work to slide the drawing into Kili's tunic. He couldn't wait for the younger brother to discover it.

* * *

Kili felt so lost. His brother still rode ahead of him. He wouldn't even make eye contact this morning. Kili felt he was starting to go mad with tension. He had only been separated from his brother for short periods of time before. Ever since they had wrestled two days ago, Fili had been pulling away slowly.

He felt so alienated. His brother was his tie to the group. Without him he was nothing. He had fallen back to the rear of the company. Kili didn't want to hear the quiet laughter at the front, or listen to the stories of old. Kili felt something scratch across the skin of his chest as he stretched and reached into his clothes to right his tunic. And found parchment. His brow knit as he pulled it out and unfolded it.

And was very glad no one could see him. Kili glanced furtively at the company. He didn't know anyone who could draw – so who would draw this? It was obviously drawn last night when everyone else was asleep. Kili felt his blush spread from his neck to his face. He wished what as drawn on this picture was true, but he doubted it.

He was asleep in the drawing, with Fili on his side behind him. That wasn't out of the norm. What was new was the fact that Fili was up on his elbow over his shoulder and his arm wrapped around Kili's chest. Fili looked so tortured, as if what he wanted most was right in front of him but he couldn't have it.

Kili felt his heart skip as he thought about his brother. He wished what he saw in the drawing was true and not wishful thinking.

Fili was nervous as the company set up camp from the night. He was worried about his brother. Kili had hung back from the group all day, and didn't even speak during the short break for lunch. Which was abnormal.

What worried the older brother even more, was that when he glanced back to check on his younger brother he saw Kili holding a piece of parchment. The same type of parchment that he had found on him the day prior that showed him and Kili drawn together. Was Kili the one who drew it?

Fili shook his head at his foolishness. Kili couldn't draw. He could barely carve. The only artistic ability his younger brother had was fletching arrows.

So if it wasn't his brother, why did his brother have the same type of paper? Unless…

Unless someone had given him the same drawing. Fili felt his blood drain from his face. What if Kili now knew how he felt about him? The whole point of him pulling away so that Kili wouldn't know how much he needed him. His worst fear was that Kili would hate him. After all, Kili was young and could have anyone he wanted. Why would he was his older brother when he could have a lass and a life and children?

* * *

Sitting across the fire, he couldn't believe his nephews. Thorin shook his head. The angst was killing him. If those two morons didn't figure it out by now, the whole company would have to take a rest day and tie them together. This was ridiculous. Maybe he would have to put the two together on watch tonight. Maybe the tension would finally get them talking. And admitting to certain feelings.

Thorin called the two brothers over to him and fought to keep a straight face. Neither brother would look at the other or stand close together. "The two of you have the dawn watch."

Their eyes flared open simultaneously, and they looked at each other before looking back at their uncle. "But uncle…"

"No Fili. You have the dawn watch together. Perhaps the last two days apart during watch have worn on you. I'm just putting things back to the way they were. You two have been distant with each other for a couple of days now. This is unacceptable. You are brothers. The company does rely on you, and you need to be able to rely on each other. Now eat, and get some rest. I expect you two to behave like adults and heirs of Durin tomorrow."

"Yes uncle."

The brothers were very quiet that night. Duly chastised by their uncle, they set up their bedrolls and faced away from each other. Each was in a panic about what the next morning would bring.

One thing was for sure, it was going to be a long night.


	7. Day Four Part One

Kili felt like he had just closed his eyes, when it was time to get up to take over watch. He had spent the entire night trying to figure out what to talk to his brother about and had come up with absolutely nothing.

Granted he knew what he wanted to talk about. But that subject was closed for discussion. Kili couldn’t imagine his shame and embarrassment if Fili ever found out about his very unbrotherly love. The picture he was given the day prior was bad enough. Bad enough that someone else in the company had noticed how much he depended on his brother for everything.

Well, maybe not everything. He could do some things on his own. Like archery. He could do that by himself just fine. And… um… other stuff. Plenty of other stuff. Like… Um…

Damnit.

Ok. So he was attached to his brother. But that was ok. He could be attached to his brother and still maintain his silence. It wasn’t impossible. Just hard.

With that in mind, Kili turned to look at his brother. Fili was still sleeping, but his face looked so peaceful. Finally devoid of the cares that weighed on him ever since Thorin had named him heir. Kili watched as his brother’s face scrunched as if he were thinking very hard about something. So he took his finger and gently traced away the frown lines. 

What could his brother dream about that would cause him such concern? Kili knew that the dreams he remembered were all of Fili. How his brother looked, the games they played together.

Kili drew away, and gathered his courage. “Fili,” he said, as he shook his brothers shoulder. “Time for our watch. I’ll meet you there.”

When Kili saw his brother’s eyes flutter, he pulled himself out of his bedroll and away from his brother.

* * *

 

Fili did not want to open his eyes. He had spent the whole night dreaming about the coming watch with his brother. He had tossed and turned until he finally given up and stared at the dark curly hair in front of him. It always looked so soft and so perfect no matter what shenanigans his brother got up to.

Fili had comforted himself and slipped his fingers into his brother’s hair. Soft, silky, slightly tangled, but soothing. His brother’s presence always soothed him no matter what.

Which made his brother’s rapid departure to attend to the watch and subsequent absence weigh on him. He truly was alone without his brother by his side. He could talk to his brother about anything. Could share anything with him.

And didn’t that just take the cake. The one thing that he really wanted to share with Kili was the one thing that might drive him away. Maybe that was the point.

Maybe it would be better to share it and let the cards fall where they may? Wouldn’t it be better to share his thoughts and feelings with his brother no matter what? What if him withholding it was causing them to drift apart too far? Maybe getting is off his chest would help him to bury it. Maybe Kili would be able to ignore it and they could stay close like they always have.

Besides, Kili had looked just as depressed for the past few days as he had felt. Fili could feel his brother’s dark eyes burning into his back. Feel how Kili had snuggled into his body heat when the wind picked up.

Maybe…

Thorin said that Kili didn’t like being separated either. And there were the stares that the entire company kept giving them. Including Bilbo, and he had just joined them. The rest of the dwarves had known them since birth. They obviously knew something that him and his brother didn’t.

Then there was the matter of the drawings. Who drew the damn things? Thinking back, Fili was sure that Kili had been holding a drawing. The same drawing? A different one?

The mystery was going to drive him spare.

Fili sighed. He had best join Kili for the watch before he tattled to Thorin that the supposed responsible heir to the throne slept in and neglected his duties.

When he finally dragged his body into the clearing, he found his brother facing away from the camp staring at a boulder. After minutes with no movement, and no acknowledgement of his presence, Fili chuckled.

“I don’t think it does tricks brother.”

Fili caught the look of panic on Kili’s face just before he looked at what held his brother enthralled.

Another picture. This one showing the two of them kissing. Which had never happened. But Fili had to admit, it sure looked good.

“Did you…” Both brothers began and then stopped.

Fili swallowed hard and gathered his courage. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to speak to you about brother.”


	8. Day Four Part Two

“Wait. Before you say anything. I just need to know that no matter what happens you will always stay close to me. You’ll always be my brother.”

Fili turned to face his brother. “Aule Kili, you’ll always be my baby brother. Nothing will ever change that.”

The brothers shifted their position closer to each other. Fili reached down and picked up the drawing and held it between their bodies.

“Remember when we used to spend every minute together? No matter what, we were never more than a foot apart?”

Kili smiled. “That wasn’t that long ago brother. We still spend all of our time together.” His eyes became sad. “Well, except for the past few days.”

Fili sighed. “I never meant to hurt you.”

“Then what happened? What did I do?”

“Oh little brother. You didn’t do anything. I just couldn’t wrap my head around something.”

Kili got annoyed, and pulled the drawing away from Fili. “What was bothering you so much, you couldn’t talk to me? We always talk about everything. By Aule, I probably know more about you than you do.”

“Not this. It’s shameful.”

“Shameful?” Kili shoved his brother down onto the boulder. “What could be so shameful that you couldn’t tell me? I love you. You’re my big brother.”

“That’s the point. I’m your big brother. I’m supposed to protect you, not…”

Kili knelt down and was shocked to see the fear and sadness on his brother’s face. His usually calm, completely in control of his emotions, brother looked so lost and alone. He swallowed hard, and gathered his courage.

“Is it because you found out that I don’t like lasses?”

“What?” Fili gasped. “Don’t joke Kili, I’m trying to be serious here.”

“I’m not. I’ve never been with a lass.”

“But all the stories at the pub that are told about you. You always leave the pub with a new lass when we go out, and don’t return for hours.”

Kili shook his head. “You’re talking about you, not me. You always leave the pub before me, and I can never find you for hours.”

“I don’t understand. I always thought the lasses were all over you.”

“No. I could never do anything with them. Or anyone.”

“Why?’ Fili whispered.

“They weren’t you. Everyone I met, I always compared them to you.” Kili leaned into his brother, and rested their foreheads together. “My idiotic older brother. Don’t you know that I love you?”

Fili squeezed his eyes closed, and felt a tear fall.

Kili’s heart broke, and brushed his lips over his brother’s cheek to catch the tear. “Please don’t cry. Just help me understand what’s going on. I can’t sit by and watch your torture yourself. Whatever this is, we can figure it out together.”

Down on his knees in front of Fili, he felt his brother finally rest his weight against him. His strong arms wrapped solidly around his shoulders.

“I love you too brother. I always have.” Fili nuzzled into his brother’s shoulder and breathed in his brother’s scent. “There will never be anyone for me but you.”

Kili chuckled. “What a pair we are.”

“I got a drawing of us a couple days ago. Showed us asleep wrapped around each other.”

“I got one yesterday. You were wrapped around me watching me sleep.” Kili shrugged. “I knew after I saw that, that I had to do something. That maybe it was why you pulled away. Maybe you felt the same as me.”

Fili pulled back and wrapped one hand around his brother’s jaw. He traced his brother’s lips with his thumb. “I want to try something.”

Shifting his eyes from his brother’s eyes to his lips, Kili’s breath hitched. His brother’s tongue had flicked out to wet his lips.

The first thought that went through Kili’s mind was how soft his brother’s lips were. Next: Oh Aule I’m finally kissing Fili!

The brother’s separated for a breath of air, before deepening the kiss. Hands were starting to wander. Fili slid off the boulder to kneel in front of Kili. Fingers were just starting to slip clothing ties apart, when someone cleared their throat. And saw the entire company standing in the tree line.

* * *

Thorin was trying really hard not to laugh at the brother’s obvious discomfort. Neither brother had noticed that the entire company had been standing in the tree line watching the exchange. Their faces were bright red, and they were looking anywhere but at the company. 

Oblivious siblings. Thorin couldn’t believe that it took them four days to figure out that they were in love with each other.

“You finally figured it out laddies?” Dwalin barked at the brothers.

“Enough.” Thorin stepped closer to his nephews. “Granted when I put you two on watch together, I was hoping you would sort this out. However, I would like to remind you that watch means looking out for the rest of the company while we sleep. Next time? Try to focus.”

“Yes uncle.” They both whispered.

* * *

 

It was later in the morning, when Thorin heard purses’ of money being thrown behind him. The hobbit was gleefully pocketing each purse. Thorin shook his head. Cunning little hobbit bet four days for the brothers to get together.

Wait…

Thorin had seen that parchment before in the hobbit’s journal. When Bilbo’s eyes finally met his, he winked and watched the hobbit blush. Thorin wondered what else the innocent looking hobbit could draw.

* * *

While Fili and Kili knew that the company stared at them throughout the day, they had eyes only for each other. They rode with fingers laced, and soft smiles. All they could think about what how right their kiss had felt. Maybe Thorin would put them on watch together again.


End file.
